don really wana post...but there are things i need to get off my chest..

am i really going through the same cycle over again? getting my hopes up and watching them fall every time...i need to move on and be who i am...but why am i always stuck in the same if not, similar situation...totally don't get it...worst case scenario would be the same result i obtained in the past...which, for the last time in my life, i do not hope for...

then there's always the case where we act as if nothing ever happened,though all of us will know that something did happened...we may pretend but the wound will always be there...mostly, i'm the only one wounded...so why do i always fall back into the same trap over and over again?

the feeling's getting intense once again,building up faster than i could catch up with...getting screwed around by my own heart really sucks big time...it's worse than being played by others...the only way to numb myself is to get myself loss in the world of mapling so that i will spend more energy and brain power on maple instead of this issue...

second thing is more of a private issue...which i'm not really gona let anyone in onto it...it's just too personal...and i'm still trying to figure things out...and i know for sure there's 3 ending to it...either one will come...no matter which is which...realized that getting too caught up in this issue might have been the silliest thing i've ever gotten myself into...it's like being in a cave while digging deeper in,1- i find treasures in the cave,2- i dig too deep in yet find nothing, or 3- i dig my way out of the cave. which ever it is, it's all fated...so i shall just leave it as that...

now to get my longed await sleep